Like most women reading this post, I haven’t always been comfortable at taking a compliment. I don’t know if it’s part of being female, or if it’s a personality thing, but I suck at accepting nice words face-to-face.
Just the other day when leaving an industry event, the sweetest woman came up to me to shed some compliments and was incredibly kind. She mentioned how she loves how easy to work with I am and how I always put my customers first and that it shines through and sets me apart in a predominantly male industry. Which hello, is crazy nice! But like usual, I did something I like to call “dis-compliment” myself. I think I said something along the lines of “OMG no, you’re too nice, I’m not that good and I’m just doing my job!” Which is what I ALWAYS do.
After we ended our chat (which I probably made very awkward) and I was driving home, I entered the cycle that also always occurs after those situations. I beat myself up for not handling it correctly. I thought about what I should have said. I should have just said “thank you” It’s like I turn something that should make my day into something that stresses me out! It’s kinda crazy and totally ridiculous if you think about it and I hope I’m not the only person who does this?
Not only do I think there’s power in being one of those people who can graciously but confidentially accept a compliment, but I knew at that moment it was something I could work on. I stopped to think how I could handle a compliment in the future. After all, this person is going out on a limb themselves to come up and talk to me (basically a stranger), and it’s just SO incredibly sweet. Instead of putting myself down and being self-deprecating, I should of just thanked her. It’s such a simple shift, but one that really takes being conscious about to make a plan of sorts.
Obviously, I’m not the only one who gets compliments – and heck, I actually give them all the time. I’m the first person to tell a girl that I love her dress or hair or whatever, but for some reason, I’m just not good at receiving them. To be honest, it’s so bad and awkward that sometimes when I go out for dinner and the server says “enjoy your meal”… I’ve actually said “thanks! You too!” Am I the only one that does this? Am I a freak?
I urge you to try this next time someone is paying you a compliment. Let them know genuinely how it made you feel (it probably encouraged you or made your day, like it does mine!), and say thank you. That’s it! You’re not a bad person for accepting it, and it doesn’t make you cocky (which is how I always felt). It’s simply accepting something you’ve probably worked hard at doing, right? Right!
I’d love to hear from you all on this post. Do you have the same issue with not being able to accept a compliment? Do you think you can learn from reading how I changed my thought pattern around it? Am I being ridiculous?
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XOXO.
B.
Hey, recieving compliments is not wrong. I would suggest learn to say thank you for those people who appreciate you. 😍😍 Thanks for sharing this. Keep it up.
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Thanks Cessang, it is certainly something I am working on 🙂
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I struggle with this too, but I’m trying to get better at just saying thanks and if I have something nice to say in return, saying it!
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Totally there with you. I wonder if it is a generation thing. I have a hard time tooting my own horn as well, even at the interviews. I’m slowly getting better at both but I brought up to believe that it is not nice to brag about yourself (even a little bit) and to always return the compliments, hence the ‘you too’s. old habits die hard…
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Oooh, good point!! Maybe it something that was just implanted in us since we were younger!
My BFF thinks I do it because “it is the Canadian thing to do” haha
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Ha! Then it is a Ukrainian thing to do as well, considering that I grew up there 🙂
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Compliments are still weird for me to deal with too! But I try my best to just be grateful & appreciative!
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